Bothersome

Something is bothering me

What-that I don’t know

Trying to formulate in words

But they just won’t flow…

                           

The feeling is deep

Disturbing my sleep

Souring my mood

Attracting me to food

Losing interest of fun

Or getting work done

Oh what a bore

Everything’s a chore

Feels like it’s gonna rain

Just want to complain

Enjoyment is gone

Could go on and on.

Sigh, I will stay with this sorrow

Until it turns tomorrow

Novocain

The dentist gave me Novocain Before he drilled to numb the pain. Why all the hurt?  if it could be prevented Blessed be the one who invented. And Then I came home  started to eat But wasn’t able to tell if  'twas tart or sweet. Couldn't taste the food and so instead Chewed my lip until it bled. There are  problems that are very real Which can happen if you cannot feel.

I decided to use Novacain On my heart to numb the pain Why be hurt? it could be prevented From being degraded and feeling all dented But Being loved, cherished just wouldn’t stay Feeling care or concern went the other way To protect my inner self in a time of need I didn’t even know that a heart could bleed There are some issues which are very real That stay unresolved when you cannot feel.

Metaphors

On thin ice that can crack

Or blindfolded; hands behind back

A loose tooth used for chewing

Without a coat in a storm brewing

A kayak in stormy rivers

Teeth clatter, stomach quivers

Walking down steps, ice covered

Attempting to keep a fire smothered

Balancing on three inch heels...

Is the way Trusting feels.

Hidden

I keep my feelings hidden

Under the cover of my mask

With the smile on my face 

You wouldn't even think to ask

I keep my feelings hidden

Because they are meaningful to me

I don't know if you will care for them 

The way it's meant to be

I keep my feelings hidden

So they are safe and secure

I know that this way

They will be protected for sure

If I would allow my feelings

To be honest and open

Will you treat them with respect

Or will they be broken?

Will you laugh them away?

Or dismiss them with your hand,

Brush them off like an annoying fly, 

Show you don't understand?

My feelings are so fragile

And need to be handled with care

And I don't know what you will do

So they are staying inside here.

So I keep my feelings hidden

Scared to be discussed

For though to share may bring relief

Don't know if I could trust. 

Warning! Blocked Feelings Ahead

State of bliss

Or

Sinking abyss,

Loneliness

Or

Happiness.

Boldness-

Coldness,

Numbness-

Oldness.

Are your options

More or less,

When filled with

Nothingness

How are you feeling today?

Well

A little bit of ....

Agitation

Blues

Concern

Disappointment

Edginess

Freakiness

Grief

Happiness...? (well, yeh, maybe a little)

Intenseness (oh sure! a lot)

Jumpy

Kind (kinda)

Longing

Misunderstood

Nervous

Opinionated (more or less)

Passionate

Quiet  (... nah)

Restless

Silenced

Tiredness

Underpaidness

Vexation 

Worry

Xactly!... basically anyway

Y-

Zank you for asking!

Anger

When dealing 

With a feeling

Through concealing

While inside reeling,

It is no wonder

All the thunder

Makes me blunder

Must it release 

For inner peace?

( hope not)

Will it over flow ?

I don't know. 

I need my smile 

All the while 

For my profile

Yet I fear

I'm  aware

That I can flare

And I don't dare!

 I decide

It must reside

Inside

Kept away for

It is safer

(You ask why?)

Because I can't trust

If it's discussed

It might be brought about

 With my anger; a shout

To get it out 

To be misunderstood,

 Is certainly no good

Though I really should

If only I could,

If only I could.

Denial

need space

a place

to erase

             the past

where facts,

impacts

are not exact

            dont last

live  a lie

and try

to deny

          the pain

when hearts bleed

from past deeds

there’s no need

          to explain